How families become part of the violence against women

Representational image. Photo: Pixabay/ Tumisu How many of us have watched our mothers suffer in silence? We know the sounds. The joke at the dinner table that lands at her expense. The way she goes quiet at a party when he talks over her. The gathering where the men fill the room and the women serve them, and nobody notices that half the people present have agreed not to exist as individuals. We know the sentences, too.

You can travel wherever you want once you’re married. Get your master’s degree, but ask your husband first. You’re too opinionated; no one will marry you. Did you see her drinking at the party? She must be too modern. Why take the job or accept an offer from your dream university when you could simply change your name and live for someone else? And on her twentieth birthday, the clock starts ticking.

A girl is expected to build a family before her brain has even fully matured. I have heard every one of these, and so have you. I hated them every time. People said them as if they were advice. They never were.